Let’s talk about Emotional Alignment and how this can affect your internal freedom.
Emotional Alignment is defined as the accuracy with which you perceive the past and assess the future. Overall it represents the degree to which you skew reality.
This theory uses the four critical areas (pillars) of your life to help guide you toward personal freedoms
- Mind (thinking, logical)
- Body (physical)
- Spirit (subconscious thoughts, patterns, behaviors)
- Vocation (job, career, legacy to the world around you)
When you struggle in one area (a trigger), this struggle will continue for a lifetime if not acknowledged and processed in a healthy manner.
We all have triggers.
For example, one of my biggest triggers involves impatience. When I would inevitably get stuck in the slowest line at the store, miss the green light because of a slow driver in front of me, or waiting for my kids to tie their shoes so they won’t be late for school, my trigger would rear its ugly head.
Your trigger(s) may be very different. You may have 1 trigger or may have 21 triggers. It all depends on your awareness of the situations that cause you what is ultimately unnecessary stress.
Now let’s connect the dots. To make this easy (and personal), I will use my own example of impatience.
When this would pop up, I would notice my heart race a bit faster, my breathing become more shallow and my mind finding scenarios of how this will turn out to be the worst outcome EVER. Then I would begin to speak more quickly with a higher-pitched voice and repeatedly explain and complain why this delay is going to cost me.
Turns out, I was mostly right. It did cost me but it wasn’t the delay. It was my inability to let go of needing the situation to go exactly on my schedule. It was my lack of knowing that 1 minute isn’t going to change the course of my life. It was also realizing that I had a fear of missing out on something in life because of childhood situations that would make me feel like if I didn’t hurry I would miss out.
The hardest thing to do is acknowledge your triggers. Once you’ve owned up to them, the rest is somewhat easier (although truly not that easy).
First, you will need to take a hard look at yourself. You will need to be brutally honest and forthright with the real you. Here’s the thing: nobody is grading this. Nobody else cares that you are embarking on this treasure hunt of unpleasantries. This work is done solo. So don’t be shy. Take your time with it and open up to the real you.
Once you have acknowledged 1 or more triggers, it’s time to write down (yes write) why you have these triggers (FREE journal prompt workbook). I did say it gets easier after finding your triggers but this part is hard too. You now need to fully examine why you feel the need to react the way you do. What is it about the scenarios that created the reaction? Your reaction may be to yell, eat, watch TV, sleep, self-medicate with alcohol or drugs, or any other situational remedies you might find to escape the current reality.
Here’s where it gets a bit easier.
When you have been triggered (and you will for a time), you just acknowledge the situation, laugh, and let it go. That’s it.
This may seem way too easy. Good. The more you can allow the acknowledgment and the laughter, the less you will be triggered. Each trigger will feel smaller and smaller. Until eventually you won’t be triggered anymore.
Let me get back to why and how this affects your internal freedom.
Getting triggered is like picking up a hot coal to throw at someone – you get burned in the process.
Allowing life situations to create anger, fear or resentment, only pile on unneeded stress. Stress can deplete the body of healing while also creating disease or illness in the body. Having anger stops you from enjoying life. Having fear stops you from a spontaneous adventure. Having resentment prevents you from having beautiful relationships with people.
Working through your triggers frees your body from taking on a burden that only hurts you.
You will feel emotionally, physically and spiritually lighter. You will see the world in a different light. You will find that more opportunities come your way, that situations open up for you and people treat you differently.
When you are emotionally free from your shackles, you will find the four pillars to grow and strengthen. They will support each other rather than rely on each other.
As for my impatience, the more I acknowledged each situation, the more I was able to let go and laugh. Eventually, my lesson was learned. I now experience peace from within.